al-Qa'ida is a faith-based initiative.
Won't *someone* stop the Guv'munt from evoking our rights!?!
Submitted by Serephin on Wed, 04/28/2010 - 3:16pm.
43SB reader KC in Boise found this flyer on his doorstep yesterday from "Republican Constitutionalist Traditional Family Values Pro-Life, Lower Taxes" candidate for District 19, Precinct 50 state Senate candidate Debra Miller, who's looking to take on incumbent Democratic State Senator Nicole LeFavour.
Here's the text of the flyer (with, *ahem*, editorial commentary) --
Hello Neighbors,
My name is Debra Miller.
I reside at 1911 W. State Street. I will be running to represent you as Precinct Committeewoman for our 59th Precinct here in Boise.
Umm... I thought you were running for State Senator, as your card says. Apparently, you're running for both positions, but there's nothing like confusing your potential supporters right off the bat, eh, Debbers?
I am a Small Business Owner and CEO of Boise Trolley Tours.
♪♫ Ding, ding, ding went the wingnut... ♪♫
I have been active in politics in the past, and wish to serve our neighborhood by helping to restore the commonsense values that has made America great. This includes adherence to Our Constitution and Bill of Rights which guarantees YOUR Rights as Individuals to Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness.
Because, as you know, after all these decades under the iron-fisted rule of Democrats in Idaho government, all your Gawd-given rights have been methodically ripped away like a Brazilian Hot Wax treatment.
Oh, and "Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness" is in the Declaration of Independence, not the Constitution or Bill of Rights.
It also protects YOUR Rights to own property and bear arms in accordance with the 2nd Amendment.
Oh, thank heavens! I've grown so frustrated with Guv'munt only allowing me to arm myself with water balloons and whoopie cushions. (Every tried to take down an elk that way? Deucedly frustrating!) I thought about joining a militia so I could load up with slingshots and a snazzy new trebuchet, but a good TV show was scheduled to come on later in the evening so I put it off.
Also, there's no mention in the 2nd Amendment about owning property. Just sayin'.
Our Federal Government is out of control! They are recklessly trying to evoke YOUR Rights & are spending your money with no accountability!
ZOMG!!!! The Feds are trying to evoke MY RIGHTS!?! Those dirty bastards! Where's my phone? Where's my Congressman? Where's my damn water balloons?!? To arms, to ARMS! AAAAUUUUUGGGGHHHHH!!
I'm asking you to join me in Righting these wrongs being done to us as American citizens. Get involved and do the Right thing.
[INSERT MARTIAL MUSIC HERE]
Change starts with you and with your VOTE!
The primary election is May 25th (8AM-8PM) and the voting location is at: Madison Elementary School, 2215 Madison Ave. I will get an absentee ballot to you by May 19th if you choose to vote for me. I can be reached at 208-433-0849.
While you're at it, ask her to drop you off a sandwich and a diet Pepsi. She'll so do it. Really!
Vote for YOUR Rights Candidate,
Debra Miller
According to Ms. Miller's website, she has a MedTech BS from University at Albany-SUNY and an MA in counseling from Webster University (though she writes like a junior-high dropout). She's been a John Birch Society loon, a Ron Paul groupie, and is a proud wingnut member of the Idahoans for Liberty ("Idaho, Idaho, Über Alles!"), the Eagle Pachyderms, the Elk City Unicorns (OK, OK, I made that one up), Treasure Valley Tea Party, Tea Party Nation (this gal luvs her some teabaggin'), Campaign for Liberty, The Freedom Foundation, and of course the Rethuglican Party. She gets all tingly over some Limbaugh talk-radio wannabe (he also broadcasts on shortwave. Squeee!) and is Borned-Agin', hallelujah!
Her platform includes: favoring Tax Cuts, Sound Money and the Pro-Silver Gem Act (what, no bartering livestock for surgical procedures?), opposing Federal ID, Microchips and Body Scanners (but how will we ever discover the Malthusian Space Aliens hiding amongst us then, eh?) and is koo-koo for Coco-Puffs over abolishing the Federal Reserve & the IRS. Oh, and her battle-cry is "It's Miller Time!!!" No, I'm not kidding.
Poor Debs... if she was any nuttier, she'd be laid out on a bed of vanilla ice cream and smothered with chocolate. That said, I wonder why she's not running instead for Governor in the Republican primary -- she seems more than qualified.
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Well slap my ass
and call me Debbie. That's just what Idaho needs, a tarot card reading med school failing carpet bagger who apparently swings both ways. What's a "State Certified Entrepreneur and Minority Small Business owner"? Do you get fries with that? For someone who hates government she sure spent much time in and out of education and certification programs.
The Pink House
My wife and I had a great time with this when I showed her the flyer last night and my FaceBook friends had a few laughs as well. I had only seen such poorly written campaign flyers on websites or blogs until this one showed up on my doorstep yesterday.
There used to be some really great punk shows at that address. We called it the Pink House back in the late 80's/early 90's. I wonder if she can still smell all of the spilled beer?
“They hang the man and flog the woman
That steal the goose from off the common,
But let the greater villain loose
That steals the common from the goose.”
— English folk poem, ca. 1764
Most evocative
It is indeed Miller time.
I don't think...
1)...she can get someone an absentee ballot. She can give them a request form.
2)...she can offer to do so on condition they vote for her. That may run afoul of a few election laws. But she's not worth looking it up.
I've heard about that house Buffalo Guy. Thanks for weighing in here. We'd like to see more of you.
Read her "about Debra" section. See how many contradictions you can find with her assertion that she's for "traditional family values". And "Republican Constitutionalist" is really funny since she asserts that "Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness" are rights guaranteed in the constitution.
But its sad really. She's clearly using this campaign to market the Boise Tour Train but she's too stupid to know she's running as a whacked out teabagger in the People's Republic of the North End of Boise. She's gonna lose the campaign and drive the business to bankruptcy.
Hilarious
" 'elp! 'elp! I being regressed!"
Monty Python
"When all else fails, revel in the absurdity of it all"